Friday, December 23, 2005 07:03:21 AM
TRANSLATION
President George W. Bush's Assessment of 2005
Before heading to the Camp David presidential
retreat for Christmas,
George W. Bush evaluated the year
that has nearly ended. Our team of so-called
reporters with
far too much time on their hands translated
what he had to say.
George W. Bush: 2005 has
been a good year for the American people.
Translation: 2005 has been a
good year for the American people,
except if your name is Scooter
Libby, if you live in New Orleans,
if drive a car, if you fight in Iraq,
if you like seeing your government borrow money from
China, if you're a sitting president with
a rapidly declining approval rating...
Otherwise, boy, what a great year.
George W. Bush: This has been a year of
strong progress toward ... a prosperous America.
Translation: Just ask the CEOs of Chevron,
Shell and Exxon.
George W. Bush: There's still an enemy that
wants to harm us.
Translation: That's why we'll have to spy
on Quaker meetings to stop them from ever daring
to attack us again.
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